back on the horse

The act of writing is like any other exercise, need to warm up, speed up, cool down. Well, the whole process for me could be condensed rather quickly...zoooooommmmmm. Since I am not going to travel this Easter Season I can relax and enjoy the meaning of this season. Perpetual Lent describes my life. Lent, not the season to deny the self but the season to examine the self and to serve others. Not too different from my everyday life. Situations in my life feel more balanced and peaceful as I look forward to the organized chaos of my travel in June and November. Organized chao is better than disorganized chaos don't you think? I like and feed off chaos. Strange admission for my chosen profession. Now that I know that organized chaos feeds my mind the way disorganized chaose used to I choose to create this in only the travel part of my life. I hope to be clearing up any issues remaining in relationship with other people so that those relationships are filled not with chaos but safety. That's a difficult process due to the fact that other people are involved and I can't control them or their responses. Once we figure out that are life is not about being in relationship with other people, it is about being in relationship with God through other people, we can choose the healthy expressions of relationships to please our creator not ourselves. I beleive that gives us permission to jetison relationships that are not up to paying the "price" of being in relationship with ourselves. Its not about dumming down our expections but simply saying "I will not participate in unhealthy behavior while in relationship with this person". If you find your self having to break moral rules (see 10 commandments and Golden Rule for further advice) to be in relationship with someone then I guarantee that harm comes to all who participate. Our choice. Free will that funny little human quirk that God has empowered us with. What do we do with it reflects healthy life and healthy life is all God wants from us. Its just that simple.